
This is my first time reading a memoir by Mary Karr. Though I have heard a lot about both her and her books and even have her other two on my wish list, I had never had the experience of sitting down and getting to know this praised author through her writing before. At about the halfway point in this book, I wanted to stop reading and go back and read both of her previous books, The Liar's Club and Cherry. I found myself wanting to know so much more about her and the things that led up to this final book, and though I will be reading them out of order, I went out and got a copy of each of her other memoirs. Just knowing that they are patiently waiting for me makes me happy.
Mary Karr has the ability to render her memories in clear detail, without overdoing it, and one of the things I most appreciated about this book was the way that she, at times, allows for flaws in her interpretation of the things she is chronicling. She relates her story clearly but also tells the reader in no uncertain terms that the emotional slant she puts to some events may have only been her feelings in the heat of the moment and does not reflect what time does to alter these memories. I liked this a lot. Too often, I read memoirs that rely on past interpretation to be infallible and sometimes I wonder how much of the anger and disappointment of the past colors the perceptions of the author's tale. In order to avoid this, Mary comes at things from several angles, interjecting in her own story the traits and emotional states of the others she comes into contact with. This makes her tale much more informed and well rounded and creates a certain trust between the reader and herself.
I also liked the fact that she doesn't fall into the trap of villainizing everyone but herself. Often, Mary admits that she could be a beastly companion and mother, and that although she tried to be as altruistic as she could, she sometimes failed miserably. That she was honest enough to admit this made her appear to me more human and fallible and made me realize that often the way we see ourselves is just as important as the stories we tell. She freely admits that had this story been told from the pen of her husband, the reader would probably not like her very much at all, but for the most part, I felt that she was able to see herself and her actions without the rose colored glasses that often hang on the nose of authors telling their life stories.
I felt a real affinity for Mary's spiritual search because, in essence, a lot of it mirrored my own problems with spirituality. She speaks of not being able to find the God that is right in front of her face and talks at length about her antipathy towards humbling herself in prayer. Mary is a free thinker and somehow feels that religion is the opiate of the masses, a phrase that I have uttered on many occasions. Her gradual involvement in worship felt very real and heartfelt to me and I loved the fact that she learned that to embrace God was not the same as erasing her sense of self and her individuality. It made me joyous to see her embrace prayer and for her to realize that her prayers were being answered.
There were also a lot of sections about her love of poetry and her struggles to become a poet of acclaim, her struggles to be a good mother to her son, and her heartache over the dissolution of her family. In these sections the book became like a prism that reflected the secret parts of her heart. Karr has a way of opening herself onto the page and becoming someone that you can deeply care for, both in her brokenness and in her healing. I think the sections that dealt with her early family life were those that resonated with me the most. It is a mighty thing to see a child's unswerving love for parents who have consistently done her wrong. Her spirit of forgiveness was mammoth, and although she did a much better job raising her son than her parents did with her, she never shot forth with recrimination and bitterness for all she had suffered.
This was an amazing read that had both spirit and flavor, and Mary Karr surely knows how to tell a story that will keep readers on the edge of their seats and frantically flipping pages. The book had a remarkable feel of both a confessional and an accounting, and in the author's very capable hands she takes readers right along with her in her journey through life. I would definitely recommend this book both to readers who relish a good memoir and to those who are interested in matters of spirituality. I know that I will be enjoying more from this author, for she has won me over with both her candidness and forthright writing style.
About The Author Mary Karr is an award-winning poet and best-selling memoirist. She is the author of Lit, the long-awaited sequel to her critically acclaimed and New York Times bestselling memoirs The Liars’ Club and Cherry. A born raconteur, she brings to her lectures and talks the same wit, irreverence, joy, and sorrow found in her poetry and prose. A sought-after speaker, Karr has given distinguished talks at prestigious universities, libraries, and writers’ festivals, including Harvard University, Oxford University, Princeton University, Brown University, Syracuse University (“On Salmon Rushdie” with Salmon Rushdie), the New York Public Library, the Los Angeles Public Library, the Folger Library (Poetry Society of America/Emily Dickinson Lecture), The New Yorker Literary Festival, PEN/Faulkner, and the Festival of Faith and Writing. Karr welcomes conversation with her audience and she is known for her spirited, lively, and engaging Q&A sessions. Connect with Mary:
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A warm thanks to TLC Book Tours for providing this book for me to read and review. Please continue to follow the tour by visiting these other blogs:
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This book was provided as a complimentary review copy.